there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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