haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Randomize
