She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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