didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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