I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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