even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I think I just sharted jello shots
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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