I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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