Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
