Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
