Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
