Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
