I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
tell me about the eggs
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
