Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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