I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize