she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
