I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.