Farmville is her only friend.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
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