His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
