Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize