Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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