Princesses don't give blow jobs
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!