But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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