Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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