You made me cry and you don't even care
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
