That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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