One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
