Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize