eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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