Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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