I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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