Ambien. No doubt about it.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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