oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Four minutes until I can fart!
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize