Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
