I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
