i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
