her vagine was all disorganized.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
