Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize
