There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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