I wish i was in the wii world.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
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