Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
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i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
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Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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