I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
