You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
So many bounce houses so little time
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
