What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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