We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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