I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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