i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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