they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
