Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
