Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
