i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
