he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize